I never get enough sleep, so I really don’t need a call at 1:30AM from a FAX scammer. My phone lets me turn off the ringer during specific hours, so I could just let everything in the middle of the night go to the answering machine, but the last time someone called in the middle of the night it was my friend’s wife because my friend was in the hospital. I got up and went down there as fast as I could for moral support and that’s a good enough reason to leave the ringer on. But if these FAX scammer bastards keep calling I don’t know what I’ll have to do.

My shiny new bathroom scale was supposed to be delivered today, but I got an email that said that UPS had broken the scale and they were refunding my money. Why didn’t they just SHIP ME ANOTHER ONE? Maybe they know I’m going to be jumping on the scale repeatedly and MAKING A GRAPH. Nobody really cares about what I look like naked, and really I’m too lazy to be neurotic about that sort of thing. I mean, who (besides my doctor) is even going to see me naked? A man of my age should probably be wearing EXTRA clothes.