Springtime is still getting the best of me. Thunderstorms with the requisite hail and periodic downpours mixed with slight hayfever symptoms aren’t really the best of fun. But I’ve been making up for it by spending way too much money. This morning I found out that the Apple Worldwide Developer Conference is from June 7-11, so I bought a ticket for $1599. I think work may pay for airfare, though. I also found out that just the hard drive in my new laptop is $1300. Whatever. I’m still trying to buy my way to happiness. Gadget happiness anyway.

Speaking of laptop, it was supposed to ship in 5-7 business days. Today is day 5. I have my fingers crossed.

I had to get to work early for a 7AM meeting. This sounds like a bad idea all around, doesn’t it? I’m cranky as it is, and getting to work with no breakfast and no coffee wasn’t making it any better. Things didn’t get much better until closer to lunch time.

Most everyone bailed on me for burger club again (queue the suicide watch) so I’m making reservations for Ringside. I’m hoping my former heterosexual-life-partner Il can make it to our twice-yearly pilgrimage to RIngside because they’re going to shut it down, move it, remodel the old location, and reopen it in a year and I’m not sure they’re going to have the food as dialed in as they have it now. In any case, I’m dragging my sorry ass there whether Il wants to go or not. I’ve had two birthday dinners already and this will be the third. Of course I never did get a birthday discount card from Ringside so I’m going to have to use the one my mom gets for her anniversary.

My parents married 363 days before my birth date, so it all happens about the same time of the year. Her birthday in March, mine in April, her anniversary a couple days later, and my dad’s death day three days after that on tax day. My dad’s birthday is in May. My sister is the weirdo with the August birthday and the February anniversary.

I didn’t feel lightheaded at the gym tonight, but my stomach wasn’t feeling all that right. I was much more fatigued than I usually am, so I’m still not 100%. Could be worse.

OK, I must admit that I feel a little better now, but right before I went to the gym I felt lightheaded. And when I was talking to Melissa, just nodding my head yes was making me woozy. I stayed and did the workout with less weight than usual, and by the end I thought I was going to throw up. I only stayed because I was thinking no one’s been sick lately so this must just be the weather since it went from almost 70 and sunny to cold and raining today. I just realized that I know PLENTY of people who have recently been sick. Plus, I would have emailed the gym to tell them I wasn’t coming in, but I destroyed one of my servers again and I was off of the intarweb for a while. I need a new hobby.

So I was informed that I spent $1300 on a hard drive. I replied that a single dude with no chance of dating can do things like that. Unfortunately, that reminded me that the laptop hasn’t shipped yet and I’m getting impatient. Oh, who am I kidding, my current laptop is fine and I don’t really care when the new one arrives. I should just buy another Windows laptop like the one I have at work because the pain would make me feel more alive.

Speaking of which, I have a 7AM meeting tomorrow. I better pretend to go to bed soon even though I was told to keep reading The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Apparently I’m not even halfway through the tedious part, but it’s supposed to be more interesting after that.

Last weekend I actually got out of the house. Went out to dinner with friends, saw a couple of movies, got a ridiculous haircut, etc. This weekend was much more typical, catching up on laundry, reading a couple of books, and I did get out to eat but it seems a little different when you’re doing it on your own. I got to read a lot more. I think someone is playing a prank on me and has told me that The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo is an interesting book and not some dry, corporate shenanigans that are as interesting to me as watching paint dry. Oh, the business trickery! Oh, the cleverness! Oh, the painful boredom!

The pace of foreign mysteries is a bit more languid. I want to tell the author to get the hell on with it. I don’t really give a crap about the detective’s whole family unless it furthers the story. Maybe it’s just the stack of ten physical books and four Kindle books that is making me impatient but come on, I want to see some bad guys get caught here.

Oh my dear god does my ass hurt right now. Monday we did front squats. Tuesday we did jump squats and I also did 27 birthday burpees for Matty G. Wednesday I must have done something else, oh yeah, broad jumps. Today was sprinting around the block, deadlifts, Turkish get-ups, and Tabata squats. The question really is, “Why?” I guess I’m supposed to have some sort of fitness goal, but I think my goal is just to effect some sort of self-torture. I am really tired today with what seems to be more than just leg fatigue but I still went kind of hard and I’m still left questioning why. The only answer I can think of is: because I can.

We went to Mash Tun for burger club tonight and it was a fun little brewpub. The tot-chos, Nachos with tater tots instead of chips, were great but the burger wasn’t my favorite. They cooked it as rare as you asked, but the meat was overly seasoned and tasted to me like salty sausage of some sort. Not my favorite sort of pork sausage, either. The bun was great and while I didn’t try any fries, how can you be against any place with tater tots? The beer was tasty as well and I’d go back with little hesitation.

I spend most of my day at work sitting in front of a computer, and when a stupid m*th*rf*ck*ng mistake from McAfee trashes my computer, I’m pretty hosed. And guess what? It pretty much f*ck*d up everyone’s computer at work. Let’s see, that’s probably 10,000 people * 6 hours * $70/hour (using numbers I’ve pulled out of my ass) or $4.2million wasted just at our company. THANK YOU MCAFEE YOU WORTHLESS SONS OF B*TCH*S!

Unlike last Wednesday, my other problems weren’t as big as having to repair my car. I went to buy admission to the food cart extravaganza, but they’re out. I broke a tab on a 160GB hard drive, making it an expensive paperweight. It’s just a spectacular day. One of my friends from the gym thinks that luck is cyclical and balanced, meaning something good is going to happen to me. I’m afraid I’m just using all my luck just to stay alive. Besides, luck is random and life isn’t fair. Time to order my new laptop to make up for it.

I can’t believe how tired I was at the gym. I don’t think I was dragging around, but I did have general muscle fatigue. My legs are tired and I was getting cramps in my lats. Front squats and ball slams on Monday are probably part of my problems, but also doing Matty’s 27 birthday burpees before the workout is probably another. The brains behind the gym told Matty that he wouldn’t be able to find anyone to participate in his madness but she didn’t realize how foolish I truly am.

Just for the fun of it, a picture from the gym.

So there you go. Tired at the gym, birthday dinner for Matty at Pepino’s with way more white people than I’m used to seeing at a Mexican restaurant, and then some Alotta Gelato. Low key, but tasty.

My sister was in the Oregonian, and I know half of the three people who read my blog are here because of my sister so I scanned the pictures and here they are. It took FOREVER because, basically, computers suck.

I know, they’re scaled and the color balance is off. It would have been quicker if I just got out a goddamn crayon and reproduced the effing things by hand so you get what you get. It’s a scan from a frigging newspaper for chrissake.

I’m also very tired from the front squats at the gym, and also from finding out that the bastard who backed into my car not only fucked up the bumper and the grill but also punched a hole in the radiator. I now have fifteen hundred reasons to want to kick someone’s ass, but really I’m not that angry, just annoyed.

The high point of the day was driving Sean to get his new iPad. I got to see him start it up and play with it. I think I want one now. Geez.

I keep looking in the mirror and frightening myself because I don’t recognize the dude with no hair. I remember the first time I did this at MIT, walking down the Infinite Corridor I could feel the heat of the lights on my head. Fortunately it wasn’t real hot or real cold today.

Sean convinced me to go to see Death at a Funeral today. I don’t usually go out to see that many movies and he’d already convinced me to see Kick-Ass on Friday. I guess I’m just getting outside more often lately, probably because I’m alone in the house now that my mom is off in Japan for a month. I am behind on a few things, including watching the TV shows on my DVR and ironing my shirts, but I should be able to squeeze that in later. Heck, I was able to clean the lint out of 10 Concept 2 rowers today. I’m not even sure why I thought I had to do that, but at least it’s finished.

I think I had my final birthday dinner of my birthday week tonight. I started out with a family dinner at Laurelhurst Market, a dinner with gym friends at Metrovino, a dinner with Sean at Veritable Quandry, and another dinner with THMFIC at the gym and other gym friends at Laurelhurst Market. Plus, my friend Sun conspired with my sister to get me a bottle of Ardbeg Single malt scotch, which I’d been looking for but couldn’t find. Who knew you could look up availability online?

Really, though, I’m so stuffed full of beef that I can hardly think. You may not be able to get exactly what you want at Laurelhurst Market, but what they do have is tasty as hell.

One of the guys at the gym is always trying to get me to get my hair cut a lot shorter than I usually have it cut. Today I had it done. Then I also remembered that I started growing it out because my ex-girlfriend from a heck of a long time ago told me to. So off with my head.

The short hair was supposed to make me look more butch. I think it kind of makes me look more foolish. Plus my head is cold.

I got a couple of birthday presents this week, and one of them was some alterations to the front of my car. I only noticed it this afternoon, when I returned to my car as I was leaving work, so I thought it happened then. There are only three places I park and that’s the one that gets the most traffic. But when I got to the gym I found the missing part of my grill out in the street and I knew someone just backed into my car. And didn’t leave a note. Hooray.

Tonight burger club went somewhere WITHOUT burgers, Koi Studio {1}. I had a K-dog (the trucks are always out), Korean Fried Chicken, some sweet potato fries, and a chicken slider. I feel especially full, but I think that’s because the spicy food is trying to eat its way back out. Next time I think I’m going to try a Korean quesadilla.

This is my birthday week and I’ve felt pretty good all week. I was asked by one of my friends (the one who told me I should go out with women I find unattractive because that’s all I was ever going to get at this point) what age of women I could go out with now. Well, the Sex and the City calculation is half your age plus seven, so (46/2)+7 = 30. But I’ve come to find that calculation ONLY WORKS FOR WOMEN. I get all sorts of shit for wanting to go out with younger women (well, 30 is about the limit, really, because too young and I’d just go insane listening to their “Lady Gaga” or some such shit) but all the single women my age are going out with 30-year-old guys. Plus they get all huffy when I use the “C” word (Cougar) and take any enjoyment out of teasing them by being indignant. I mean, really, isn’t that about the only joy I’m going to get out of this?

One of my buddies, a good looking Indian-American dude, told me he’s never asked a woman out. He’s never had to, really, but he’s a shy dude and ti’s worked out for him. I can’t say I’ve never asked a woman out, but my success rate has been pretty poor. At least it’s been within a decade, or 19.6% of my life rather than 100%. How to hide the facts with math, man, it’s an art.