More silliness.

Whatever goes on at the gym is pretty much what I can talk about, since I really shouldn’t talk about work. Everybody knows that all jobs suck and that’s why they pay you to show up. In any case, it’s all work, gym, and sometimes remodeling the house and I’ve got little else to talk about lately.

I must be going to the gym too much since there’s pictures of me on their blog. Silly pictures. And today I was feeling kind of puny and wasn’t really all there. I should probably get more sleep and not let work stress me out. But, like I said, (suck) + (money) = (life in general).

Winning the race by selective rulemaking.

Some time in the past month or so, I decided to race one of the women at the gym to see who would be the first to get a muscle-up. She’s very competitive, so I decided to make it a secret race and never told her about it. Good thing, too, because she would have kicked my ass.

Hot hot heat.

In yet another stolen picture from the gym, here’s pasty old me, The Head Honcho, and the woman who I was in a race with but who wasn’t in a race with me.

This is all a lead-in to say I got my first muscle-up today! It was a surprise to me and everyone else, so I had to do a second one so The Head Honcho could get a picture. The Brains Behind the Gym decided the pictures were no good so I did it a third time for more pictures. And, since I was feeling rather full of myself, I did it a fourth time at the end of the workout. I was told to take a break for the rest of the week to avoid tendonitis or something. It’s a good thing I did it today because I was supposed to get one before The Head Honcho’s birthday next week.

I was even late to the gym yesterday. Lately I keep getting panicked customer calls at work after everyone else has left. Since I’m the only one there, it’s suddenly my problem. There are days when I’m the first one to leave and I’m trying to make that EVERY day, but when everyone goes missing at noon it’s hard to precede them. I guess I’m just not trying hard enough.

Man I have a lot of crap music.

I was going to mention some of it, but every time I thought, “This is the cheesiest 80’s song I have,” I found another that was much cheesier. Back when I worked at Verinform, I almost killed my boss walking back from lunch when I talked about how the 12″ remixes of Spandau Ballet was too repetitious and how I felt justified in buying another copy of their “Best of” album that had the non-lengthened music. He was laughing so hard he had to stop walking to catch his breath.

One of the things they do at most Crossfit gyms is to take pictures of the workouts. You can imagine how many pictures there are of me making weird faces. The pictures of last Saturday are something I wouldn’t pay any money to see: it was on its way to another 100°F scorcher and I was working out with my shirt off. There’s even a picture of it. Like I said, I wouldn’t pay to see that sort of thing.

In other news, I heard that school is about to start and kids’ soccer practice begins next week which really means that I’ve pissed away my summer yet again. Hooray.

New! and Improved!

I spent a lot of time this weekend swearing at computers. We had all sorts of trouble yesterday trying to get an old copy of WindowsXP onto a brand-new computer. I’m hoping my friend (who is the contractor) figured things out. Today I decided to update the horrible Gateway I had running the web site with a horrible Dell. The experience was, well, horrible. I’m not a big fan of either company but the best computer is a free computer and you know how that can just mean more work.

Today it was only 82°F, but it was a humid so I spent most of the day reading yet another mystery. I really should make it out of the house more, and I should also take more books to used book store, and I should clean up the upstairs more. Etc. But it’s hot (or at least it was) and I did do a bunch of weird computery stuff. So I’m lazy without being lazy, or something like that.

One bazillion degrees.

I’m back trying to blog on my iPhone because I finally got around to backing up my laptop and, as expected, it is taking forever.

We had yet another day of unbearable heat today. It was officially 98°F and after two days of 100+°F heat, everything including the streets and buildings are already hot making a mockery of the breeze which is also hot. I even had my shirt off at the gym which I’m sure will lead to more ridicule. But I guess I have a bit of a “four-pack” because someone else saw it and not just me imagining it in my bathroom mirror.

I took another nap on the floor today because that was the coolest place in the house that didn’t require a vigilant watch for weird multilegged bugs. I thought about getting a cot set up in the basement to elevate myself above the aforementioned bugs but that would have required moving around and shopping and I didn’t have that kind of energy. Next week it’s supposed to be 30 degrees cooler and I can’t wait. Maybe instead of installing air conditioning, I can install a walk-in freezer.

The conspiracy against the Asian man.

When Mark was trying to get a muscle-up at the gym there were videos and photographs and diagrams and on the white board. When I’m trying, there isn’t bupkis. Whitey is keeping me down. It’s just as well, my shoulders hurt a bit after my repeated attempts.

None of this really matters because it was 100°F today. ONE HUNDRED DEGREES. I got home and after the house was rather warm after this second day of heat and I just passed out on the floor. I often feel like I have to take a nap after work but I usually don’t pass out. I guess I’m lucky we’re not working on the ham radio antenna this week.

Every day, in every way, I’m getting better and better.

I’m not sure why everything has to happen all at once. Months and months of boredom and here I am getting all sorts of calls from all sorts of customers and none of them believe a word of what I say. Like, “Hey, you’re talking about someone else’s product. Why are you asking us about it?” My guess is that we answer quicker. It’s all very strange to me.

And it’s not enough that everyone is trying to get on my last nerve, it was also 102°F today and it’s supposed to be even hotter tomorrow. I wanted to take Friday off, but on a 104°F day it’s much cooler at work than it is anywhere else. It’s supposed to be 100°F on Sunday, too.

I seem to be losing weight, but I’m sure it’s just sweat in all this heat. In any case, I figured after all the nonsense I’m dealing with at work it was time for me to splurge once again. I did notice that after working out in the air conditioning that I weighed at least 2 more pounds than I did yesterday working out in the heat.

Helvetia Tavern.

Helen is not my friend.

The “Helen” workout at Crossfit requires a lap around the block along with 21 kettlebell swings and 12 pullups. Three times. I can run around the block a couple of times but the third time just kills me. And even better, my joints have been aching a bit lately. Time to make an appointment with my massage guy.

Other than that, I’m just dreading Friday. I was going to take the day off and run some errands like getting my hair cut and looking at the tile at the tile store, but the weather report just said it was going to be 107°F then. Sounds like a good day to sit in the air conditioning at work and hope that nobody calls. I even got a call while I was driving home today, asking me why I hadn’t replied to an email (which I hadn’t received.) It’s not even anything I was supposed to be working on. Hooray for extra confusion and yet another day of angry customers.

I really should go to bed early tonight.

Not only have I been sleepy the past couple of days, everything seemed to go to hell in a handbasket today. Several customers all seemed to think the sky was falling on the same day. That plus knowing what the workout is tomorrow, I should probably get more sleep than usual.

I’m supposed to pick some colors and tiles and flooring for my bathroom project. While my sister and Megan swear I’m gay, I’m really not, and I have no frigging clue what colors or to pick. All I know is that I want the toilet seat to be splinter-free and that I want the floor to be comfortable to walk on with bare feet in the wintertime.

Oh, and I think my friends are trying to make me look foolish again for their own amusement. They’re trying to get me to ask out an attractive woman from work who also has her PhD and is much younger than I am. According to the head honcho at the gym, I have 3 things going against me there so I must have nothing to lose. Except, of course, my dignity (if I had that to begin with.)

Mondays are sleepy.

I was a bit tired at work today, understandably, and I slipped into my regular non-work persona when I called my sister today. The contractor happened to be there as well. I let them both know that I had no idea what I was doing on this remodel and that I had some misgivings on Chinese design of parts. The words I used were a bit more blunt and now anyone near my cube at work knows I’m a foul-mouthed racist.

It’s my sister’s birthday and I haven’t gotten her anything yet. I usually ask her what she wants and she usually tells me about November. It’s good that I’m not the only indecisive person in the family.

My mom, sister, and brother-in-law all went out to dinner tonight for my sister’s birthday. When they got back here, my brother-in-law said he wanted a pipe and I thought he wanted a scrap of the galvanized steel plumbing I cut out of the basement last week. He’s an odd guy at times, so I didn’t think much of it. Turns out he was looking for one of my dad’s old tobacco pipes. My sister and I were so sick of smelling smoke when we were growing up up that I gave away all the pipes and none of us — me, my mom, or my sister — wanted anything that smelled that foul. There are plenty of good memories of my dad without those malodorous things.

A dangerous place to stand around.

I was standing around for most of the day, but instead of just standing in one place comfortably, I was 70 feet up in the air trying to get my friend’s ham radio antenna down to the ground so he could fix it. I was one of the “lucky” ones who got to go up the tower. It’s kind of weird, you don’t get to move round as much as you’d like (because falling to your death is a bad idea) and if you drop something it’s a big production to get it back, especially if you hit anyone down on the ground. When I got passive-agressive about it, I’d make sure no one was near my drop zone and I’d drop things that were getting in my way, like water bottles.

We started in the early afternoon and I think I finally got off the tower at 7:30PM. My buddy who owns the tower bought us dinner afterwards and I had something unhealthy since I thought I deserved it, but I didn’t expect to see 4 orders of ribs on one plate. Those people in Scappoose sure know how to eat.

In retrospect, I really have to find a weekend where I can just sit around and watch TV or something.

Watching a train wreck.

I hung out with some people watching a UFC fight tonight. I’m not a very violence-prone guy and I try to avoid it in most cases, but I get sucked into watching things like that. It’s like watching a train wreck. I can’t look away.

Speaking of train wrecks, I went to look for bathroom fixtures yesterday and found some nice, boring fixtures from Price-Pfister. Unfortunately, my plumber and my contractor told me to go back and find something else. It’s my understanding that Price-Pfister has had some trouble with their kitchen sink fixtures. I went and found something slightly nicer that cost approximately $600 for the valves and fixturing for the upstairs bath. Then I also looked for some fancier things for the downstairs since it gets used much more often and the fixtures I priced there were more like $2000. I think my mom also wants the Toto Washlet bidet as well.

I suppose there’s a big question about why I’m spending so much money on this, but I haven’t had a girlfriend since 2001 so it’s all for me to spend how I want. Although if I ever do get married, I bet my wife will tell me to tear all this crap out and replace it with what she wants, but that’s much less likely than lightning striking me at this point. Especially since I have to climb my buddy’s 70-foot radio tower tomorrow to do some antenna work. Good thing I’m not sober now, but unfortunately I’ll probably be sober by the time I have to climb up that damn thing.